Breaking Point
by sebastians-pierced-penis
Summary: Logan is finally at breaking point. For months, he has had to hide his feelings for his best friend and its been slowly destroying him. All he wants is to be with him, with Kendall. Is that too much to ask for? Apparently so. Rated M for future smut.


"…._to the back, back, back. On the side, side, side. Tonigghhttt…."_

Logan smirked as he slowly faded out the last note of the song. Everyone around the Palm Woods began clapping and cheering and the four boys couldn't help but laugh.

Mama Knight put her arms around Katie and grinned, "I love it when they play outside!"

Gustavo, proud of his 'dogs' performance, threw his arms up in the air and cheered "Big Time Rush World Tour, here we comeee!"

More applause and sounds of excitement arouse from the audience and the boys of Big time Rush cheered along with everyone. Logan high-fived James, who was on his right and received a pat on the back in return. He turned to congratulate Kendall, but found that he was no longer behind his mic. He looked up and saw Carlos who was beaming. _Must be because of curly haired Jennifer, _Logan thought to himself, happy for his good friend. His smile quickly turned to a frown when he remembered that his blonde friend wasn't next to him.

He reached over and poked Carlos' shoulder to get his attention and because of the constant cheering, Logan mouthed the words "Do you know where he is?"

The Latino instantly knew who he was talking about and his eyes turned sympathetic as he pointed towards the front of the audience and mouthed back "Sorry buddy".

Logan, confused about his friend's comment, looked in the direction he was pointing at and his heart sank. Kendall was with Lucy, laughing and smiling with his arms around her shoulder. He stared at the two, suppressing the urge to pull his friend away from her. Kendall turned his head and found Logan staring at him. He gave him a big grin and waved. The shorter boy tried his best to smile back with the same amount of enthusiasm, but failed. He simply put his hand up as an attempt to wave back and smiled weakly back before moving away from his mic and through the crowd. Kendall noticed his friend's mood and made a mental note to check on him later on just as he got distracted by something Lucy said. Logan pushed past James and his group of girls, _I just need to get away, _he thought to himself. Just as he made it past the crowd, he felt a hand on his shoulder.

Logan turned around to yell at the stranger to let him go but found that it was Carlos who was holding on to him.

"Logan…" The smaller of the two, whispered.

Logan closed his eyes and shook his head to stop himself from crying. Carlos pulled his friend into a hug and rubbed his back in an effort to comfort him.

"Logan, I'm sor-"

"Stop Carlos" The smarter boy choked out, "I'm…I'm fine. I just need some time alone. That's all" He then pulled out of the embrace and turned to walk away, but was stopped once again by his friend.

"Just, talk to me when you are ready, okay Logie? I'm here for you buddy" Carlos said, genuinely worried about his best friend.

Logan nodded and walked away, grateful that he wasn't stopped this time. He walked past the pool and as he entered the lobby, he turned and saw Kendall place a kiss on Lucy's cheek. His eyes began to well up and he swore to himself. He ran towards the lift and as soon as he reached apartment 2J, he locked himself in his room and broke down in tears on his bed. He didn't know how long he had cried for until he finally fell asleep to the sounds of the soft wind blowing against the trees outside.

When Logan woke up, he noticed he was alone in his room. He rubbed his eyes and tried to adjust to the sunlight coming through his window. He reached over to his bedside table to find his alarm clock and realised that it didn't go off that morning at the usually time of 7:00.

"What time is it?" He asked to no one in particular.

"Its half past ten, Logie" The familiar voice came out of nowhere, scaring the sleepy boy.

Logan, who wasn't expecting someone to answer, jumped up on his bed and took up a ready 'karate' position, screaming. It was a habit of his which he developed as a kid. He always thought he was secretly a ninja and only realised that was impossible three years ago when he tried defending his friends against an entire hockey team…only to be beaten up to a pulp. By girls. But even so, he was never able to shake off the habit.

The intruder began laughing uncontrollably and Logan finally noticed it was Carlos. He was holding a plate of pancakes while clutching his stomach, laughing.

Logan blushed and jumped down from the bed and took the plate off his friend, seeing as he was barely able to keep it from dropping to the ground.

"Stop laughing" Logan pouted, hitting Carlos in the chest, which only made him laugh even harder and fall to the floor on his bottom.

"Oh…god..Logiee" The Latino managed to say between his giggles "I've been friends with you since forever and that still gets me every time" Logan let out a sigh and hit him on the back of his head.

Carlos immediately stopped laughing and rubbed the sore spot "Owwww, what was that for?"

Logan rolled his eyes and said matter-of-factly "For laughing at me, idiot". He then walked past his friend who was still on the ground, out to the living room, sat down at the table and began devouring his pancakes.

His roommate finally stood up from the floor and joined Logan at the table. He folded his arms in front of him and rested his chin on top of them.

"You could at least thank me for making you breakfast" Carlos mumbled, loud enough for the eating boy to hear.

Logan let out a soft chuckle and put his hand on top of the darker haired boy's head, which was currently occupied by a helmet, and said "Thanks buddy"

Carlos sat up quickly, surprising Logan, and grinned like a child "You're welcome! Anywaayys Logieee, what ya wanna do today?!"

Logan turned his attention back to his pancakes and thought about the question for a moment. Today was Wednesday and usually they would be in the studio, rehearsing. He turned back to Carlos and asked "Wait, why aren't we practicing at the studio today? We have our tour coming up soon, don't we?"

Carlos stood up from his seat and ran to the kitchen, confusing Logan for a second, until he came back with three corndogs in his hands and another hanging from his mouth.

"Well apparently" Carlos started saying. He still had the corndog in his mouth so his words were all jumbled together, but Logan managed to figure out what he was saying " Gustavo is giving all of us a break before he starts training us for the tour. So we have the rest of the week off! YAAYY!"

Logan nodded, finally understanding what was going on and was about to speak when he was cut off by the Latino. Logan smirked, it seemed like he wasn't done talking.

"That's why I turned off your alarm this morning! I didn't want to wake you up since you looked like you were still tired!" Carlos was talking quite fast from the excitement and had somehow managed to finish eating his second corndog during the conversation. Logan actually found it quite impressive. "And James and Kendall went out early since they didn't turn off their alarms and I think they are hanging out with Lucy and some other girls James met yesterday. And so I thought I might as well stay and hang out with you since the Jennifers are out at…an…audition…."

Carlos stopped talking and noticed that his friend's mood had quickly changed. He was no longer smiling but was now staring down at his hands, which were fiddling with the hem of his shirt. The darker haired boy then realised it was his fault. _Argh, why did I mention Kendall and Lucy, _Carlos thought angrily to himself. _IDIOT!_

Logan stood up and excused himself from the table, but Carlos grabbed onto his arm and pulled him back down onto the seat.

"Look, Logan, I didn't mean to-"

The brunette looked up at his friend, the sadness evident in his eyes and voice "No, its okay Carlos. I'm fine.." He smiled to prove his point but even someone like Carlos could tell it was fake.

"No, no its not Logan. Stop saying everything is fine. Its obviously not. You have to talk about this sometime soon." Carlos put his hand on Logan's shoulder, as he spoke. "Please..Just talk to me Logie"

Logan stood up and shrugged the hand off his shoulder. He was now furious. "No, Carlos. Why? Why do I have to talk about this? What difference does it make? Just stop okay?" He then stormed off into his bedroom and slammed the door behind him.

Carlos immediately followed after him, ignoring the fact his friend was mad. Logan needed to talk to someone about this, he couldn't just avoid it for the rest of his life.

The Latino stepped into the bedroom and found the brunette sitting on his bed with face in his hands. His shoulders were shaking slightly and he could hear sobs coming from the other boy.

"Logie…"

Logan shook his head. "Just don't Carlos. Just don't"

The shorter boy went and sat down next to Logan and put his arm around him, hugging him softly. To his surprise, he wasn't pushed away but instead his friend rested his head against the Latino and continued crying. No words were spoken between the two for a while, with Logan crying to his heart's content and Carlos simply listening to his sobs.

After who knows how long, Logan finally calmed down and his tears had finally stopped. He felt somewhat better after releasing all the emotions and anger he had bottled up for the past few months.

"Feeling better?" Carlos asked softly

"Yeah, I guess" Logan whispered back. "Thank you."

"Anytime buddy. How you feeling?"

"Tired, annoyed, sad, angry, jealous, pathetic"

Carlos shook his head, he hated seeing his best friend feel this way. It killed him inside. He opened his mouth to speak but Logan beat him to it.

"Why? Why me? Why did it have to be me?"Logan's voice was trembling and Carlos knew he was fighting back tears.

"I don't know Logan, I really don't.."

"Why cant I be normal and like Camille or even a Jennifer? Why did I have to fall in love with one of my best friends? And why did it have to be Kendall?"

Carlos used his free hand to take his helmet off and run his fingers through his short hair. _I don't know Logan, I wish I did but I don't_, he thought to himself. He wished there was something he could do to help his friend but he knew his attempts were useless. Logan had been like this for months. It had gotten somewhat better compared to the first month of discovering his feelings for Kendall but he still wasn't great.

Logan pulled out of Carlos's hug and lied down on his bed. He let out a soft sigh.

"I think I am just going to stay home today, sorry buddy."

* * *

_Alright first chapter done! Please let me know what you think and if you want me to continue. Thank you :)_


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